What happens when your clothes don't fit? When your black and white t-shirt is too broad for your shoulders? We still try to wear the clothes hoping that someday we'll grow large enough to fill the gap between skin and fabric, the feeling that you are being hugged by what you wear, the pride, the dignity. Maybe some day you fill the gap but realize the clothes no longer suit you. They never did. It can feel like dissonance, what you expected versus what you receive. What you tell yourself should fit, doesn't always. Make your own clothes. Feel the thread brush your skin, the prick of the needle poking your pores, and no longer will you feel a 'Misfit'.

Privacy has become more of a liberty than an expectation. What you do with your time has become a commodity, to be traded for social & monetary credit. What does it mean to want to have that privacy, to choose that separation, to value privacy as a lack of values you? Being open is fine, sharing all of you is fine, but trust your gut, know when to 'Pull the curtains'.

It's the season where skin becomes bronze, brown hair becomes bronzer, and the sunsets become bronzed. Bronze of a day with energy expelled laying in the sun. I look back on days like these and remember the feeling of blanket blue sheets of heat loosening the sunscreen on my face, cold water resting against my arm, the sun dyeing my eyelids orange. Let the calendar raise your spirit until autumn comes and you are left with but leaves to remind you of that colour. What better explains summer than this radiant bronze.

We spend so much of our lives living through other people's curated lives, the highlights, the funny moments, the luxurious ones to the point where it affects our own. It's not our fault, it's what we've been conditioned to do, but once in a while, sit back and spend time 'people watching', the reality of people's day to days becomes so clear, everyone is trying to make things work, everyone is in their own bubble trying to expand their radius, you are no different from the people you see online, you never wanted your desired materialistic reality, all you ever wanted was to feel different and you don't need materials to do that.

Devotion is not discipline. It is more. Discipline insinuates the action of doing is the motivation, devotion is the action of doing with the motivation being your vision. How do we be devoted to something? Where action is the side effect of ambition. When the world is silent and no one is looking, what do you do? See the bigger picture, be what you believe in, understanding is only essential for your mind, 'lying flat' is your vision, what others see is not true to you, keep moving, judgement exists beyond you, don't make it exist within.

Vulnerability is something that knocks you over and picks you back up, a risk that rewards greatly, a feeling if failed; fuels regret, it is something that requires practice and patience, a key to self love and the love of others. Do you love yourself? I don't yet. But in painting I find myself more everyday and love myself a little more, 'Moxie' is what I need, 'Moxie' is what I want to become, 'Moxie' is what I am.

What does it feel like to have the ability to answer to someone's prayers, to be pushed into the position of deciding someone's emotions, knowing that you can make someone happy at the cost of your own. The feeling in your gut conflicts what seems so perfect externally, you stand between the passage of a wish, weighed down by the examples your life has set for you and the example you want to set for yourself, I am not ready to hold this decision, the vision of my wish does not align with yours and I can't compromise. I can't answer to your prayers, 'I am no god'.